To the left is the blanket I crocheted for Mark…of course, Darcy and Scout love it…Mark will probably be spitting up Scout fur for the entire year. Oh well!!
Thought #1
One of many reasons I love Seton. It’s only 7:45 a.m. On my way to my office after checking in, Annette, a senior who was in my small group on February’s Encounter, stopped me, wanted to give me a hug, and told me that she’s been praying for me and wanted to see how my week has been. I’ve never had her in class. We briefly met on a retreat last year. Despite the fact that we don’t know each other well, she made my day have a great start. Additionally, my friend and co-worker from across the hall stopped by, and one of my CLC freshman was all concerned that CLC won’t continue and be as good as it is with me. Seton is going to definitely be a hard place to leave.
Thought #2
I can’t wait to get home to St. Louis. Only 36 days till I am in St. Louis. It is lonely here; I feel like I am in a holding pattern. I’m just tying up loose ends…can’t wait for 36 days!!
Thought #3
This whole experience reminds me of the stages of grief. I know I will get through this but it’s so hard to feel motivated. I should have gotten through so much more work today. And I didn’t blow too much off. I didn’t waste time on the internet…I just didn’t get as much done as I usually do. It’s hard to put my mind to it and to stay focused. When I get home I’m just tired and lonely…all parts of the stages of grief. I know I’ve harped on this before, but I can’t believe the military doesn’t give both the active duty member and the dependents some sort of counseling or strategies for dealing with the emotions that come along with a deployment.
Thought #4
Technology is AWESOME. Why is it awesome? Mark and I got to talk through Skype! It doesn’t matter that our call dropped a dozen times and our conversation only lasted 15 minutes. He was able to use Skype through the wireless internet connection on his phone. Plus, for only $30 a year he can call landlines on Skype. Amazing.
I can’t imagine what it was like to be separated in World War II or even Vietnam. Mark was telling me a story today about the grandparents of one of the guys who is with him. His grandparents didn’t talk on the phone for four years during World War II. All communication was through letters. It gives me more respect for that generation. I can’t imagine. What strong men and women…and just imagine…the divorce rates then were lower than now when we HAVE technology to help us stay connected.
Thought #5
Mark’s blanket is finished. It’s way bigger than I expected it would be. It fits great on a queen size bed, so we can use it when he gets home. I made sure the pups loved on it so he has a piece (Ok, let’s be real about this…pieces) of Scout and Darcy in Iraq.
Thought #5
German! I took my first lesson of German on the Rosseta Stone. Very interesting program. We’ll see if I learn anything before I meet with Frau! I have 113 days to learn German!
Thought #6
I still miss Mark. I can’t wait until he is in Taji and we can get a routine going and really talk. It’s hard to believe still that this is our life for a year. Tomorrow I have my ultrasound to see how my follicles are responding to the double dose of clomid. Instead of calling him and having him here with me to hear the news, I have to send it to him in a Facebook message. If I need an HCG trigger shot, I will have to call the nurse/neighbor down the street and have her do it. This time, I go to my IUI by myself; I have no hand to hold When I get pregnant (notice, no ifs…my dad told me to expect a miracle), I have to wait for Mark to pop up on Skype or write him an e-mail of the good news. Is this how it is supposed to be? Absolutely not. I know everything happens for a reason. This year is definitely full of obstacles. I just have to remember God wouldn’t give me anything I can’t handle…and I know that goes for Mark, too. We’re going to come out of this stronger, and when we have our kids we’ll appreciate them even more. So it’s a positive outlook…at least for tonight. =)
